Solution Oriented Marriage Counseling
Solution Oriented Counseling (also known as "Brief Therapy") is based on the truth that couples don't have to spend a long time on a Counselor's couch to solve their relationship problems.
Solution Oriented Counseling was developed in the 1960's by a group of psycho-therapists who challenged the conventional belief about how much time a person or couple needs to focus on their problems in order to affect lasting change.
What started out as an experimental approach turned out to be the most effective method of counseling to date.
Solution Oriented Counselors believe that you can't make problems go away simply by analyzing them. Understanding alone does not move anyone from "A" to "B".
Solution Oriented Counselors believe if you ruminate about problems too long, as can happen in traditional counseling, you're more likely to stay stuck in the problems. Since what we focus on grows--focusing on solutions to get couples up and out of the pit, is what Solution Oriented Counseling is all about.
While most therapy these days is kept short for economic reasons, not all therapists have specific training in the Solution Oriented approach. Avoid any counselor who claims it will take a "long time" to heal your "deep seated hurts", or who refers to you as a diagnosis.
A Solution Oriented Counselor will assess what is not working and then focus on helping you move forward to finding new ways that will bring you the results you are wanting. The past plays an important part in Counseling. It's just not the main focus of how Solution Oriented Counselors spend their time.
To find a Solution Oriented Counselor, do your research. Be prepared to travel as there are not a lot of us out there. When you find some online--be sure to talk with one of the Counselors directly so you can get a good sense of them and their work to see if they are a good fit for your needs.
The main focus of how we spend our time together in a Marriage Intensive is how to immediately turn things around in your relationship. Each couple develops an "Action Plan" with specific steps that build love and trust. Accountability is then put in place so that the "Action Plan" turns into realized goals instead of just a list of good intentions. We believe that having accountability in place is key for long term lasting change.